It’s been two years since my last post because I failed to recall my password. Everytime I made an attempt to reopen my blog I get thwarted and I thought of deleting the blog for good. But then again I need the password to delete it. One day I realized, this blog had been my oldest online journal and it means a lot to me so I made an effort to locate my old notes where I wrote the details of Beats of Pieces. Thankfully after many strenuous searching, I am now posting my reappearance story.
It’s also been two years since I said goodbye to teaching. I thought I really turned my back to the said profession but I think I am really destined to be a teacher for I found myself training young bloods again. This time it’s in my home country, the Philippines. The reason I left educating youths in Thailand was to personally parent or raise my daughter and now that she’s almost ready for school I feel the need to do something sensible so that she will be proud of me someday.
I know that blogging requires time from me so I am hoping and trying my best that I would be regularly posting and sharing a lot of photos and stories of my new job, new home, new life and new family. This time is even busier and more challenging days for me because aside from my home and family, I have students and lessons to attend to and a post-graduate study to deal with.
I am not a very patient person that is why I am so grateful that God bless me more of it today! All my five classes were extremely uncooperative, rowdy and rebellious. I could not even hear my own voice while teaching so I had to stop and took a seat and let them continue what they please. I usually chide them verbally but I decided to skip that segment because after 2 or 3 minutes of verbal scolding they begin to ignore me again. Today, I simply gave everyone a cold shoulder, and to my surprise they stayed quiet while doing something else…
I’m praying that one day, these adolescents will become mature and appreciate what they have and regard education with high respect and value.
I always hear this word everytime major exams happen in our school. When a student fails, the teacher gives so much works and too many projects to do as punishment on top of re-tests. Imagine a student has 8 or 9 subjects. If he fails 5, all 5 teachers of each subject require re-tests and projects. Each subject asks 20-30 pages of written reports, all to be submitted in almost the same dates. If a student cannot comply, there’s nothing really the teachers can do because it is school’s policy to not fail any student, therefore he eventually gets a passing score… so what is punishment for when he can pass anyway, with or without any work?
Maybe I am a lazy teacher because I don’t give a lot of projects when one fails. Some of my reasons are simple: that student fails because he’s lazy, maybe he’s a special child or less intelligent than the others, he’s less motivated, uninspired, problematic, needs help etc…
Two more months and we part ways…miss them already! 🙂
Behind the smiles are mixed thoughts and repressed resentments due to work-related disappointments. This term, I’m having a very stressful workload, very headstrong classes and if I’m allowed to say worsening system. Everyday, I get up and always pray that there will be a miracle to get me through the day. Mid-week I’m almost voiceless and almost ready to break. But there is no choice rather to move on. When Friday has finally come, it’s a huge relief!
It is not only students that I need to deal with but also person above me and co-workers. To be honest, I have an attitude that seriously needs complete overhaul when it comes to seeing fake smiles in the hallways, overdone bows and insincere greetings… and it would be a monumental progress if I could reciprocate the same stupid smirk and acts but I’m a lousy actor… besides fake smiles and black suit don’t suit! Glad it was Friday, slim chance to see another “fake-dness” the next day! I hope things get better after the weekend…
On Thursday, the school had the “wan wai kru” or Teachers’ Respect Day where students offer flowers to their teachers as a show of their respect. For me it was just a literal “show of respect”. I know I am ranting. It is because I hate all shows with no substance. Although I was glad to get some flowers from them who vowed to be good and do better in class. I expect them to keep their promises but knowing teenagers… no fun without noise, laughter and misdemeanors! Not all of them are rowdy but sad to say only very few I’m happy with. I know they’re still young and there’s plenty of room for improvement. I hope I see them grow fine and responsible people one day. In my mind it wasn’t flowers that I need. I need the real meaning of respect but my heart is too enervated to voice out the essence of what they’re doing. Besides I can’t do the change alone, it must start from the system because we, foreign teachers, are just waiting and willing to take part. But…
The reason why I’m quitting from the job is not because of the students or their misbehavior. I can deal with them for it is normal for an adolescent to be impulsive and hyperactive. It is a combination of getting tired of the system that I’ve accepted for 8 years, change of management and caught in between management politics and a few more. Then there’s my daughter who needs me and who is now under my mom’s care because nobody can take care of her during the day when I work. I guess things pile up and give me more than enough reasons to give up so that I can carry on a life with my family and daughter…I have a feeling it’s gonna be precious!
I pray that the following days will be bearable for all of us so that I can keep a happy memory when I depart from this job… I have great memories with elementary and kindergarten students already… I hope to get one from high school department. 😀
For this week’s challenge, we want you to become a documentary photographer and attempt to capture a candid moment of a person, place, or thing. Put your National Geographic hat on and tell a story by documenting a moment in time through a single image. Capture the thrill of a skate park, or the calmness of a café patio. Let your imagination inspire and guide you!
My first time to watch a rugby game so I took a lot photos. This one is my favourite when the player chased by two others are in just few inches to home base and only few seconds to touch the ground…
And it’s the last school day of May! I’ve been waiting for you to come and bid May goodbye! I can feel June air in the near distance on this lovely morning.
I hope today is a good day unlike how my Thursday ended. Despite my whines and sighs I managed to chose goodness and that’s what’s important. Today, I promised myself to refrain from swearing because of another’s shortcomings rather stretch my patience a little. 😀
It was a fun and perfect summer for me! Two months away from hassles and working was a great opportunity to be with my family and friends as well as a great chance to wander around the place I am missing for long. I’ve waited for the perfect time to spend great days with people I value much and it happened recently. I could not ask for more from God. He gave me more than what I have asked for: perfect health, supportive partner, healthy and graceful daughter, affectionate family and in-laws!
Perfect days for trekking, swimming and hiking offered me the best time and nature’s admirable sights…
Then my daughter and I got a trip to a famous beach in South-Eastern part of the Philippines. Much obliged to my sister-in-law’s family for the best accommodation and tour at their region’s famous beach resort. I hope to visit again one day and stay longer, discover more of what such beautiful place offers…
My relatives from distant cities had a chance to see my daughter when we visited them. It’s been a while that I haven’t visited some special people who have unconditionally helped me who I become today… I’m so glad to see my uncle and aunt adore my little girl so much… so grateful to God for sending these kind of people in my life!
I got to see some special friends too who always care about me and who were all smiles when I arrived at their place. I feel lucky to have such great and dependable people that I call friends. See you again and may the Almighty keep you capable and abundant.
Food played a big role of my happy vacation. There was never an occasion or gathering without food! I gained few pounds but it was fine with me. Filipinos love to gather and eat, eat, eat! 🙂 And now it’s time to seriously go on diet… again! 😀
Summer fun and quality time with my daughter made her shine! She got to stay in the Philippines for few months though. I had to leave dear one for a very logical reason. I’m missing you so much and I’ll see you again very soon my baby! I won’t be long… (>‿◠)✌
Baby and I had the grandest time to be with my family, nieces and nephews with lots of time partying, wandering and eating. Indeed, vacation time is family time. I wish it never ended but reality gets in the way so here I am now, back at work and back in blogosphere again.